Pros
Always wanted to work for a startup bank!! Maybe one day others will believe it too!!! Throughout the last few years I witnessed exponential hypergrowth, in the sense of new blood coming into the meat grinder and old discarded. At a very calculated interval of 6-12 months! What a gamechanger! Such a splendid atmosphere eating sugary snacks to keep running in the treadmill! The very little benefits and below market pay in engineering keep my subordinates very stimulated. The -1 budget for team events is an added bonus! Loved working with burned-out engineers while trying to avoid the political minefields of toxic managers and ‘yes men’ that wait us in every corner. Turned a blind eye to bully engineers turned managers overnight and mastered avoiding sec sociopaths that were given management duties! I had the opportunity to be called into last moment meetings about compliance topics that should have been done yesterday, fudge the way to the next audit to avoid more regulatory fines from Bafin and hear about customer data stolen that nobody knows what they were! The company mission kept me on my feet, year after year! Let’s do 200 things when realistically we can do 50. Who cares as long as we can have cool warehouse parties with the founders! Total lack of focus and working processes made me better at useless ping-pong with others… almost championed the public sector 9-3 style of N26 Bank. Unfortunately other directors that come and quit within the year were not so determined. So weak :( Same goes for all those who disappeared on a friday afternoon. You didn’t see it coming, did you? The epitome of success is measured by how many CTOs we are changing within a year. Ask any engineer! My favourite interim CTO moment was when our saviour got promoted, fired managers that disagreed with the complete lack of plan, toured around offices like a rockstar with his baseball cap and ‘agile consultant’ supporters, got demoted AND quit… ALL in 6 months. What a ride! It got me more acquainted with kitkat! Finally, a big thanks to the HR hard core. Ruthless, trained in hire & fire techniques, they always find time if it’s about whipping. With resourceful denial they have been downplaying the countless something-hit-the-fan moments, giving us lots of self-praising bot-style answers about N26 achievements! The joy!! I love the way they take feedback constantly over the years and making N26 great again!! After all, it's no surprise that N26 is the top startup employer in the world! Constantly hiring and in hypergrowth. For example, since Feb last year we are 300 employees less! If this is not sustainable growth towards 0, what is it?! Apollo 13, is the mission that exactly matches N26. I’m proud to say that with such determined leadership we made it already 5 times there!! Hurrah hurrah!
Cons
Nothing… except those works council persons that dare to gather in bars to resist the masters. Treason! Good thing that the CEO sent the cops in time and showed them who’s the boss! I’m confused about his later tweet tho! Still miss those Amalfi coast CX retreats that we get pampered with. What a celebration of being in love with ourselves! After all we deserve it for doing such a job! I have no doubts about the glorious future! Running out of money or flash sale are the two success scenarios on the table and I can’t wait to give every last drop of engineering essence for our leaders pocket and future keynote story! Je t’aime N26!
